DELUSION, DENIAL AND DOWN IN THE DUMPS AT DARWEN HALF
DARWEN HERITAGE HALF MARATHON 
So where do I start after this latest racing calamity? The process of head scratching and soul searching is now tiresome. I can only conclude that I must have been seriously kidding myself leading up to this race. Perhaps I've been kidding myself all year. As far as racing was concerned, Sunday's Darwen Half Marathon descended in to little more than a decent training run as the gear shift to something like race pace would not and could not engage. Only the obligation of my pre-entry for the Three Peaks will keep me running with any sort of intent now, at least until the end of this month. Only the reassuring voices of one or two club mates urging me to give it more time is what staves off the easy option of walking away. As well as delusion, I must also confess denial. I try not to whinge too much about niggles because they are part and parcel of running, but I've fallen in to the trap of trying to hide them from myself and being too tight to go for treatment. The foam roller is preventative, but not a cure.
That's not to excuse Sunday's lack of performance one bit though. Regardless of aches and pains, training and race form once again showed a complete lack of compatibility out there on the hilly roads of Turton Moor. I had run it sensibly for the first four miles when Dave Almond rocked up from behind. Without any disrespect to Dave, he wasn't a competitor I was expecting to get too far ahead of me. On the start line I cheekily put to Dave, a former Blackburn Harrier who recently switched allegiance to the town's Road Runners club, ''what's with the away strip?''. As he nudged ahead of me looking very business like and focused on the job in hand, I pondered if what I had said had given him even more incentive and certainly plenty enough to let his running do the talking which proved to be the case. The next two miles are essentially downhill to Chapeltown and I was feeling fairly comfortable at this point, whilst Dave sounded like he was putting a bit more effort in than myself so I had reason to believe that I could turn the screw on both he and other runners jostling around us when the course heads for the sky again on the long drag through Edgworth and beyond. Wrong.
The Almond got stronger and stronger and I got left behind. I couldn't find any sort of push or thrust whatsoever. If physically my race never got going, then mentally it was now certainly over as Dave and Co became dots in the distance and then a few more places went begging to whom I had no response. The last few miles were seen out with a dummy spitting rant to Harriers legend and coach George Woodburn about this being my last race and to Mrs Woodburn, our membership secretary, about the pointlessness of paying my UK Athletics levy when I feel I can't even compete anymore. As you do.
It's all pretty negative stuff from me at the moment, so some words of a positive nature should be hereby stated at least as far as my club Blackburn Harriers is concerned; firstly for the form of race winner Ben Fish who smashed out a 69 minuter on a course which is certainly demanding if nothing else. There are, albeit a minority, of elite runners who may have the upper hand on Ben. But on this course, on that day, I'm not sure who in the country could have beaten him. It was a truly first class performances. Young Jack Hindle also showed what he's made of to come third and there is much more to come from him. Chris Davies' enviable and unwavering high level of consistency continued for fourth, much the same could be said of Shaun Livesey in seventh whilst the golden boys Guinan and Nuttall were back punching their weight in tenth and eleventh. If I was having a bad time, it wasn't as bad as fellow blue and white Ben Costello. Costello is making excellent progress and was a key figure in the club's superb eighth place in the Northern 12 Stage Road Relays the previous weekend, but this one got the better of him and I finally passed him when bringing up his breakfast against a wall. Every credit to him to for ploughing on and seeing it through.
These are some of the guys with whom I share the Witton Park track on a Tuesday night and whilst it's unpleasant that I seem to be the only one going in the wrong direction, it's a cracking group. Finally, before returning to some self-bashing negativity, a congratulatory mention to Dave Almond who was indeed in great form, winning the Vet50 category and finishing nineteenth overall with a result that would have got my nod of approval even if I'd only seen it on paper.
So back to the negativity and as much as I feel I'm doing summat right in training, I'm clearly doing something wrong. I had the legs for the distance on Sunday but the pace was stuck in monotone. With said niggles to get ironed out and a general low level of enthusiasm for running at the moment it's difficult to see where it's all going. There's a fear rather than excitement about what shape I'll be in for the Three Peaks race. Just over three weeks to get mind and body strong again for that one. If it wasn't for my pre-entry, then www.secondhandbowls.co.uk would have already received an order from me.

DARWEN HERITAGE HALF MARATHON
Sunday 2nd April 2017
1st Man - Ben Fish 1.09:17 (Blackburn Harriers)
1st Lady - Julia Hartley 1.38:49 (Ribble Valley Tri)
My Stats - 1.29:24   28th/311